I have been soaking up, rolling around in the bliss that is being with my family. I adore both of them more than anything else in the world. The moments we spend together are deliberate and wonderful. I am trying to not let one second pass by without savoring it. I can't even begin to describe the sadness I feel when I realize two things. One, Neely is growing up. She's growing up fast. And while this is such an amazing, fun, funny age, I know that soon she'll be in kindergarten and I will wonder where my baby went. And two, Neely won't always be an only child (no this isn't me alluding to pregnancy...we are not yet ready for the thought of a newborn.). This particularly gets me because I jealously guard my time with her. I want to be in her face every second of every day and I know when we have another baby I won't be able to devote as much time to her. I know it'll be good for her to have a sibling, my brother is my heart and I couldn't imagine life without him, but at the same time I wish she could stay almost 2 and my only baby forever. I wish that she would always adore me and want to tell me things and read me stories. I can't stand the thought of her being a teenager and possibly rejecting me. When the time comes for that I know I'll let it roll off of my back as my mom did, but now, while she's still so fresh and new I want to hide her away and smother her with kisses.
So, that is why I haven't found time to blog much lately.
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