I can't believe it's been over two months since I last posted.
There have been many fun things in my life since then, but since I'm exhausted I will stick to a pregnancy update. Sorry for the longer negative section, it's been rough lately.
THE GOOD
I am now over 28 weeks pregnant which is official third trimester status! I can't tell you how happy that makes me! Not just because the end is near but because it means Mabel is growing stronger every day and moving around a lot more! I love to feel my girl kicking and flipping around!
She is growing right on track and at each appointment I get to hear her strong heartbeat. I love that sound!
My weight gain is right on track as well...at this point it's supposed to be a pound a week and I'm sticking to that. I don't weigh myself at home because the battery died on my ultra old scale so we threw it away and I couldn't decide on a new one. (any recommendations?)
THE NOT SO GOOD
Did I ever mention we were in a car accident in April? Someone totaled our car.
Since that day I have been in constant pain. No exaggeration when I say constant.
Every step I take causes shooting pain in my back.
And for the past three weeks my pubic bones have made it so that I can't walk around the block...it hurts bad to even grocery shop. I can't exercise (which is the most frustrating part), I can't take my daughter to the zoo.
Needless to say, I am pretty miserable.
I failed the one hour glucose test and took the three hour.
The same thing happened with my Neely pregnancy but I had forgotten how horrible the 3 hour is!
For starters, it's painfully boring. B O R I N G. I had brought a book but it didn't help.
During the first hour after drinking that icky juice I had to concentrate on not throwing up in the waiting room. I couldn't even read I was so nauseous! Luckily the lady let me lay on an examination table for the next two hours...score!
Today I received a call that my numbers were high and I have gestational diabetes. After I got off of the phone I cried and cried. I know it's not a big deal in the scheme of life and things could be worse, but I've felt so much pain for so many months this has really overwhelmed me. I just think, "Wow...another thing that sucks."
SO.
I need to eucharisteo my mind out of this spiral because what else can I do?
I've been shoving down these negative feelings for a while and I really just need to get them the heck out of my brain.
I know the enemy just loooooves it when I am low, especially when I let it steal my joy. And really, my true joy can't be stolen, it just gets misplaced from time to time.
I will commit to finishing my 1,000 gifts before the end of August. I'm up to 960-something so it should be fairly easy.
I need to not let the constant exhaustion weigh me down.
I need to not let the constant physical pain weigh me down.
I will be holding my sweet baby girl within 2.5 months and that is enough to get me through.
Showing posts with label pregnancy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label pregnancy. Show all posts
From One to Two
I can't tell you how many people have told me that I am going to pay way less attention to Neely once this new baby arrives. It seems like most people have thought that or said it.
And honestly? It's very offensive.
People said the same thing to me about the dogs.
"Oh, poor Kiki & Sinatra, they'll never get cuddled again." or "You'll love them way less when you have Neely." or "Poor dogs, they're not going to get any attention."
And me, being the chihuahua that I am (to quote Shakespeare, And though she be but little, she is fierce.) I got mad and took it as a personal challenge to prove everyone wrong. And I did. I made it a point to spend as much time holding and petting the dogs as I did pre-Neely. I still do. Three years later my dogs have never had less of me than they did before.
And these are "just" dogs.
For people to say this to me about an actual human, the girl who made me into a mother, the light of my life, my favorite person ever invented, it's ridiculous. And I know people don't mean any harm by it, but seriously?
What they may not understand is that I never felt 100% amazing or great at anything until Neely was born. The minute I held her I thought, "THIS is what God created me to be. Neely's mom." I have almost always felt confident in every choice I've made for her as a mother. I feel like before Neely I was floating around, doing this or that, just biding my time until my real life started. And in March of 2010, it did. It started.
Sarah the Mama was created.
Sarah who never felt good at many things in a family oozing talent, knew she was great at mothering.
This is the difference between those people and me.
I was made to be a mother. It may sound boring to some, but it is truly all I ever wanted to do. I was made to have these children and pour out my love and affection into them; the same love and affection I was shown by my mom my entire life.
So no, I will never ever give Neely less attention.
She will never feel like Mabel has stolen her spotlight. She will never feel unwanted or like she has to compete.
I will use every ounce of strength in me to make sure my two daughters (daughters!!) feel adored and cherished by their mama.
And honestly? It's very offensive.
People said the same thing to me about the dogs.
"Oh, poor Kiki & Sinatra, they'll never get cuddled again." or "You'll love them way less when you have Neely." or "Poor dogs, they're not going to get any attention."
And me, being the chihuahua that I am (to quote Shakespeare, And though she be but little, she is fierce.) I got mad and took it as a personal challenge to prove everyone wrong. And I did. I made it a point to spend as much time holding and petting the dogs as I did pre-Neely. I still do. Three years later my dogs have never had less of me than they did before.
And these are "just" dogs.
For people to say this to me about an actual human, the girl who made me into a mother, the light of my life, my favorite person ever invented, it's ridiculous. And I know people don't mean any harm by it, but seriously?
What they may not understand is that I never felt 100% amazing or great at anything until Neely was born. The minute I held her I thought, "THIS is what God created me to be. Neely's mom." I have almost always felt confident in every choice I've made for her as a mother. I feel like before Neely I was floating around, doing this or that, just biding my time until my real life started. And in March of 2010, it did. It started.
Sarah the Mama was created.
Sarah who never felt good at many things in a family oozing talent, knew she was great at mothering.
This is the difference between those people and me.
I was made to be a mother. It may sound boring to some, but it is truly all I ever wanted to do. I was made to have these children and pour out my love and affection into them; the same love and affection I was shown by my mom my entire life.
So no, I will never ever give Neely less attention.
She will never feel like Mabel has stolen her spotlight. She will never feel unwanted or like she has to compete.
I will use every ounce of strength in me to make sure my two daughters (daughters!!) feel adored and cherished by their mama.
2nd Trimester!!
I've made it into the elusive second trimester!! I am so thankful that I'm still pregnant and everything is going quite well! I am still first trimester exhausted and nauseous often. I am starting to get somewhat of an appetite back so hopefully I'll start gaining weight soon! And yes, that is the only time in my entire life where I will say that, haha!
We have our next appointment on Tuesday, hopefully it includes and ultrasound and a gender scan date! I know several San Diego girls who are pregnant and they're ALL having boys so I am sure I will be on the boy list too! Plus, everyone in my family who has two kids (2 people) had a girl first and then a boy, I know the dad determines the gender but it's a funny coincidence!
This week has been filled with potty training. That's a post I will do next week when I have more energy.
I realize I didn't post anything about Neely's third birthday. I am really lame at birthday posts. I usually just can't. I can't channel the proper emotions and some things I just want to keep inside. But I will do a post with cute pictures of her flying a kite and her fun little party!
If you're still reading my blog, thanks for hanging in there!
I will post more if I ever get my energy back!
We have our next appointment on Tuesday, hopefully it includes and ultrasound and a gender scan date! I know several San Diego girls who are pregnant and they're ALL having boys so I am sure I will be on the boy list too! Plus, everyone in my family who has two kids (2 people) had a girl first and then a boy, I know the dad determines the gender but it's a funny coincidence!
This week has been filled with potty training. That's a post I will do next week when I have more energy.
I realize I didn't post anything about Neely's third birthday. I am really lame at birthday posts. I usually just can't. I can't channel the proper emotions and some things I just want to keep inside. But I will do a post with cute pictures of her flying a kite and her fun little party!
If you're still reading my blog, thanks for hanging in there!
I will post more if I ever get my energy back!
GREAT Appointment!!
We had our second ultrasound today and it couldn't have gone better!! The baby measured at 10 weeks instead of 9w4d so I lost a few days there!
My new due date is October 8th, 9 days before my birthday!! Neely was two weeks early so we'll see!
I love hearing that strong heartbeat!! Thank you Jesus!!!!!
My new due date is October 8th, 9 days before my birthday!! Neely was two weeks early so we'll see!
I love hearing that strong heartbeat!! Thank you Jesus!!!!!
9 weeks
Today I am 9 weeks pregnant. My last pregnancy ended around 8.5 with a blighted ovum and in the miscarriage before Neely, the baby stopped growing around 6 weeks.
So knowing that we saw a heartbeat at 6w4d makes me feel more secure.
But I've still be nervous.
My symptoms are diminishing but it could be just getting closer to the 2nd trimester.
Maybe this pregnancy is just going to be easy.
I have had people pray over me. I have printed out (and my mom laminated) ten verses. I read them out loud when I feel like freaking out.
At this moment I feel nauseous but it's partly because it's 1:13 and I haven't eaten lunch yet!
My ultrasound is Tuesday, I'll update here as soon as I can!
Thank you all for your kind words on my last post. I just need to keep faith.
So knowing that we saw a heartbeat at 6w4d makes me feel more secure.
But I've still be nervous.
My symptoms are diminishing but it could be just getting closer to the 2nd trimester.
Maybe this pregnancy is just going to be easy.
I have had people pray over me. I have printed out (and my mom laminated) ten verses. I read them out loud when I feel like freaking out.
At this moment I feel nauseous but it's partly because it's 1:13 and I haven't eaten lunch yet!
My ultrasound is Tuesday, I'll update here as soon as I can!
Thank you all for your kind words on my last post. I just need to keep faith.
The Truth About My 5th Pregnancy.
This is my 5th pregnancy.
Miscarriage- 2001
Miscarriage- 2008
Neely- 2010
Miscarriage- 2012
Pregnancy- 2013...?
The truth about my fifth pregnancy is that I'm terrified. Being the good Christian girl that I am, I know that God loves me and I can trust Him. But that doesn't mean that I'll be able to carry this pregnancy. Loving God and following Him does not provide any guarantees. Trust me, I wish it did. Oh, how I wish that.
The past several (fiveish) days my lower back has hurt. It's not from anything physical I've been doing; I've been taking it easy. Because of my past I associate back pain with miscarriage.
The past two days I haven't had a lick of nausea. I've tried to will it, pray it, speak it into me but no.
Today I feel like my breasts are less sore.
I am scared.
I already saw this baby's heartbeat, already heard the beautiful sound. I already have a huge connection to it. I have already daydreamed about snuggling it in October, bought some summer maternity tanks on sale, maternity jeans on sale, imagined my pregnant summer lounging at the beach...
I'm afraid it's all going to end.
Miscarriage has stolen my joy and I can't ever get it back.
It breaks my heart to write that but it's true.
I've tried, oh how I've tried, to think and speak positive.
I've tried to push these scared negative thoughts out of my head.
It doesn't work.
My body gives me signs and I hope against hope that I'm misinterpreting and that this time will be different.
Tomorrow I will be 8 weeks pregnant.
My appointment isn't until March 12th.
Pray for me.
Miscarriage- 2001
Miscarriage- 2008
Neely- 2010
Miscarriage- 2012
Pregnancy- 2013...?
The truth about my fifth pregnancy is that I'm terrified. Being the good Christian girl that I am, I know that God loves me and I can trust Him. But that doesn't mean that I'll be able to carry this pregnancy. Loving God and following Him does not provide any guarantees. Trust me, I wish it did. Oh, how I wish that.
The past several (fiveish) days my lower back has hurt. It's not from anything physical I've been doing; I've been taking it easy. Because of my past I associate back pain with miscarriage.
The past two days I haven't had a lick of nausea. I've tried to will it, pray it, speak it into me but no.
Today I feel like my breasts are less sore.
I am scared.
I already saw this baby's heartbeat, already heard the beautiful sound. I already have a huge connection to it. I have already daydreamed about snuggling it in October, bought some summer maternity tanks on sale, maternity jeans on sale, imagined my pregnant summer lounging at the beach...
I'm afraid it's all going to end.
Miscarriage has stolen my joy and I can't ever get it back.
It breaks my heart to write that but it's true.
I've tried, oh how I've tried, to think and speak positive.
I've tried to push these scared negative thoughts out of my head.
It doesn't work.
My body gives me signs and I hope against hope that I'm misinterpreting and that this time will be different.
Tomorrow I will be 8 weeks pregnant.
My appointment isn't until March 12th.
Pray for me.
!!!!!
It's true! Neely will be a big sister this October!
I am a little over 7 weeks now, we saw the baby and the heartbeat earlier this week! We even got to hear the heartbeat! It was amazing and made me cry (as most things do these days, lol!).
I'm feel nauseous (YAY) and exhausted (YAY)!
Edited to add: Since this picture has a bunch of repins on Pinterest I thought I'd give some info about it. I saw the photostrip idea on some message board but I couldn't find it anywhere on Pinterest! To make the photostrip, I downloaded the template from this link. It is a perfect size for the announcement! The font I used is 5AM Gender, which is one of my favorites and I use it on most things I make!
If you use this idea for your announcement, I'd love to see it!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)